Individual Therapy
It seems that there is an expectation today…
… that we must always be the best in all things: work, school, family, and friends. And maybe others see your life from the outside and think you have it all together.
Yet, the way you feel on the inside indicates that there is something missing…
Like longing for true connection. We are biologically wired for human connection.
We are wired to love and be loved… to belong. If our need to feel connected to others, both through intimate relationships and friendships, is not met, it negatively impacts us physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
Loneliness and isolation can leave you feeling hollow inside, with an ache, with sadness, feeling numb…
Experiencing anxiety that just won’t let up…
Like when your mind just won’t let you relax… “I can see you’re trying to sleep, so I would like to offer you a selection of every memory, unresolved issue, or things you should have said or done today as well as over the last 20 years!”
Does this sound familiar?!
Thoughts that just won’t stop, racing heart, feelings of panic, fear of social situations, feeling tense or restless and worrying all the time are signs that your anxiety might be out of control…
Feeling depressed…
Author Stephanie Meyer said, “Without the dark, we’d never see the stars.”
It’s true that life has ups and downs, but how do you know when what you’re feeling is more than just normal ups and downs? Some people describe it as not really feeling alive, as though life is happening in slow motion and it can be hard to even feel… anything.
Life feels flat, you have no interest in the things you used to love; there is a heaviness in your chest. You may have bouts of crying; or maybe you can’t cry at all, and all you want to do is sleep. Or maybe you can’t sleep at all.
It may be hard to concentrate, to think, to make decisions for yourself.
Thinking that if people could really see you…
…they would think you’re a fraud.
Pretending to know what you’re doing at work, lacking self confidence in your position, and having doubts about your abilities and your achievements.
When you make a mistake, do you dwell on it, turning it over and over in your mind? Having thoughts like, “I’m not good enough,” “I’m a failure,” even though on paper, you “know” you’re a success?
The external pressure to “have it all together” can just be too much… making you feel like a failure… as though you’re just not good enough.
Sometimes, it’s hard to sort through these things on your own.
You’ve worked hard to get where you are in life, but somehow balancing your physical, social, mental, and emotional health isn’t in your wheelhouse. It isn’t something that you were ever taught, and making emotional needs a priority just doesn’t feel quite right.
Perhaps you were raised to put others before yourself and ignore your own needs. You got the message that it’s selfish or self-centered to prioritize your self-care.
Or, maybe you feel you need to “do it all” – parenting, dedicated employee, friend, caretaker… to give and give… to be productive, leaving no time to care for yourself.
Therapy can help you identify the root of why self-care is coming last for you… whether it is codependency, depression, anxiety, or something else. It can help prioritize your physical and emotional needs so that you are able to support your loved ones and succeed at work in a healthy way.
Individual therapy can help you find your path back…
… to serenity, peace, and loving connections.
Therapy will help you do this by taking a close look at the patterns in your life that are holding you back – the recurring themes in your relationships and the thoughts that are keeping you up at night – and eliminate the scripts that no longer serve you.
Negative self-scripts are the negative beliefs you have about yourself… the things you remind yourself of daily…
“I’m not good enough.”
“I’m not worthy of love.”
“I don’t matter.”
You might sprinkle these into everyday conversation in the form of self-deprecating remarks. They influence your behaviors and beliefs.
Maybe these scripts were told you by your family of origin or peers when you were younger – things you hold within you to this very day. The roadblocks to your self-esteem.
Some of these negative scripts, or feeling “stuck,” stem from trauma…
There are many ways we can experience trauma – be it from a one-time major incident like a severe car crash, or relational traumas, such as domestic violence or physical, sexual, emotional abuse, or neglect in childhood.
These experiences can leave you feeling anxious, tense, and on edge, never really feeling able to connect. They can also make it difficult for us to feel close to others.
I use Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and attachment therapy to get to the bottom of what is really going on to help you relieve your current problems.
EMDR therapy targets negative thoughts and scripts, reprocesses them, and replaces them with positive thoughts. The main concept behind EMDR is that it uses eye movements and other types of bilateral movements and bilateral stimulation to help someone process disturbing thoughts. This can be visual, auditory, or tactile (touch); it is a rhythmic left-right pattern that works by alternately stimulating the right and left sides of your brain.
It is a safe technique that has a relaxation effect and decreases anxiety. EMDR is one of the most researched therapies in existence and has proven to be highly effective for many people. It may be just the thing that you are looking for.
It’s your time for a peaceful heart and a quiet mind.
I know that it’s easy to fall into a rut – to feel swept up in the current of life. And when you feel isolated and disconnected, ashamed or frustrated… making a phone call to reach out for help can feel like lifting a thousand pounds.
But you CAN learn the skills you need to foster loving connections, contentment, and joy. You CAN break free from the wounds of your past.
I know you can do this. The time is now. Call now for a free consultation: (805) 556-5532